How do you compare?
“Life: it is about the gift, not the package it comes in.”- Dennis P. Costea, Jr.
Do you ever compare yourself with others? Perhaps with someone prettier, better dressed, more money, more popular, more fun, more intelligent, shorter,taller, stronger, fairer, darker, funnier……. the list could be endless. And when you do how does that make you feel about yourself and about the other person? A sense of ingratitude? inferiority? frustration? blame? anger? envy? dislike? What do you tell yourself?
The flipside of this is when we compare ourselves with those who seem to be less fortunate. As a child were you ever told to remember those less fortunate than yourself and to thus be very thankful for what you had? Usually this is used as a ploy for the eating of one’s dinner and hopefully developing a sense of gratitude.
Unfortunately, this also teaches us to make comparisons with others and does not necessarily work in our favour. We may begin to see ourselves as better than others and feel superior, we may feel guilt because we seem to be somehow better off than someone else. Or we may even limit ourselves and what we’re capable of because by comparison we’re doing well. When we make comparisons with others ( either negative or positive) we lose sight of our own potential, and our unique gifts and achievements.
Instead of comparing yourself in any way at all, maintain an awareness of those both more and less fortunate and then focus on your own strengths and abilities. Think about what you’re happy with and what you’d like to change. How can you change what you don’t like? Is it simply a matter of changing your thinking or what you tell yourself? What can you build on or improve on?And what do you need to accept and appreciate as it is?
” God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”- Reinhold Niebuler